you know i realized, mainly when i looked at the picture of me holding veronica, that i'm old. so i know i'm not physically old. i cant even legally drink yet. but i feel old sometimes. like that geri whos so out of date. completely uncool and untrendy. every now and then when i'm bored i get hooked on facebook. and i take a peek at all the pictures and profiles of old friends. people from high school and my old church. and compared to them i feel so old. they are dating and partying and looking trendy. and i'm sitting at home with my brother thinking that i need to get my clothes ready for work tomorrow. my friends (those i felt somewhat relieved to be getting away from for a short while but now i miss desperately) are not out partying or drinking. they're graduating and traveling to far off places and getting married and finding real jobs and thinking about the future and having babies. and the thing is we have fun. i seriously have never laughed as much as i have as when i'm with them. but its just a completely different lifestyle from what i use to lead. these days instead of complaining about having to do the dishes and not getting enough allowance, i'm worrying about how to pay for summer tuition and finding myself cleaning up around the house just to help my mom. i'm certainly not cool anymore. i'd rather get a new pair of glasses and read a good book than buy a miniskirt. i mean i went to look for sunglasses cause the pair i bought at walmart 3 years ago have officially been broken for 2 months now and i'm in need of new ones, but everything they sell these days makes me look like a bug. how am i suppose to compete? and i have plans! for the future. these incredible plans that i cant stop thinking about and planning and wondering what i'm gonna do in order to prevent myself from getting stuck here or in rock hill. thats the life i dont really want. and on top of it all...i'm trying to teach myself sign language. sign language! i dont even know what for.
i guess i just realized that
somewhere along the way
i grew up
and i thought you should know.
Saturday, May 20, 2006
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3 comments:
Cori, my awesome friend, i feel ya...i might be feeling older than you this summer considering the roommate i just got today-her pumas are way trendier than mine.
but truly, even if you feel old because you aren't doing crazy kid things, you are full of REAL life and love. there's nothing wrong with going for the real deal, i'm glad you choose to not settle for imitations.
love and miss you :) ~Ria
co-ray...if they want to be bugs in mini skirts, let 'em. but to me, that ain't cool. pretty soon down the road they're gonna be old and still lookin like bugs with miniskirts but they're gonna be DEAF. and they'll need you to sign for them. whats up now trendy geri-bug.
it was great seein you this weekend too. i hope this week goes well for you and all.
cori, you got it all wrong. trendy isn't cool. like ria said, you keep it real and that's where it's at. and i'm willing to wager that some of the best is yet to come.
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